What was I thinking?!?! (I'm sorry)

Ok so today I had my first experience with bad personal PR.

The Facts:

- PR class was directly after lunch today, it was a one hour slot.
- While I don't think I want to major in PR I do find it to be a great class for some heated discussions.
- I wasn't taking a very active role in today's class, partly because my mind was in another place, my back hurt and I was just tired overall. (No excuse though for what happened)

The Story:

Ok so about 15 minutes into today's class my instructor Melanie handed out some information on the IABC Code of Ethics and the Canadian Public Relations Society, Inc.
We discussed (and by we I mean almost everyone but me) some of the differences between companies who use a team of in-house PR people who are on the payroll all year round and companies who hire freelance PR people. After that was finished Melanie had us all read the info on the IABC and everyone did (and by everyone, I mean everyone but me). I instead decided to draw things in my notebook and to not read the info. Not because I thought I was better than it, or because I think it's stupid, but because I was being stupid. I pretended to flip through the pages and continued doodling on my page.

It was clear that Melanie knew exactly what I was doing and then asked me what the differences were between the IABC code of ethic and the CPRS code of ethics. I obviously didn't know because I didn't read what they were. I think she expected me to lie and maybe try to make something up on the spot. However what my instinct told me to do was to just tell the truth. So I did and it couldn't have come out anymore rude.

My Exact Words:
"To be perfectly honest I didn't read it" (It was said in a very dismissive and arrogant tone)

I then realized as I was walking to my next class how much of an asshole I came off as. If I was watching myself say that, I would have said "what an asshole".
It wasn't my intent to be that rude I was just telling the truth, but they way I said it made me look like a dick.

Now I owe two apologies here.
The first to Melanie.
I showed a huge amount of disrespect to you today and really made myself look bad. I make no excuses for not reading the papers you handed out. It may not have been my intent to come off so rude, but that's most certainly how it sounded and for that I sincerely apologize.


The second goes to my classmates.
I would like to apologize for making myself look like an asshole and an all around idiot for decide to NOT do what you all had no problem doing. For whatever reason I made a choice to "just not do it" and I was wrong in that.

What I did today was stupid and rude but most of all just plain selfish. I'm not better than anyone else in the class and certainly don't want anyone thinking that that's what I think. I now view myself as being one step below everyone else because of the way I acted today.

To everyone, I'm sorry.


JW